IELTS essay Problem and Solution: Obesity

IELTS essay моего студента Problem and Solution: Obesity в 4 шага (Band Score 7.5)

Childhood obesity is becoming a serious problem in many countries. Explain the main causes and effects of this problem and suggest some possible solutions.

Шаг первый: формулируем 1 причину голода и 1 решение во вступлении:

Rarely do peopleunderstand that a problem of overweigh children has become critical these days. This essay will first discuss the root cause why this issue arises which is the unbalanced nutritionof young generation which results in various diseases. Secondly, it will be followed by an analysis of the necessity of governmental measures to prevent the harmful products spread and their advertising as the most effective way to improve the situation.

Шаг 2: поясняем причину  + пример для подкрепления вашей позиции:

The principal cause of the childhood obesity is unhealthy eating habits and this leads to impairment of normal functioningof the body. To put it differently, on no account should the consequences of junk food eating such as diabetes and heart problems be ignored. Moreover, overeating chips and hamburgers are often believed to be one of the reasons of life expectancy decrease. For example, according to a recent study of American Journal of Clinical Nutrition McDonalds lovers are under the risk of early death because of foods high in cholesterolovereating.

Шаг 3: поясняем как избежать проблемы + подкрепляем примером:

The best solution to this worrying problem is the introduction by the government measures to increase fast food concentration in the trade market. In other words, if it were notfor junk food, modern youth would form the correct attitude to what they eat. Not onlyis it important to limit these products advertising on television, but it is also necessary to reduce the number of billboards on the streets. In London, for instance, fast food advertising ban in public transport led to 10% reduction of childhood obesity.

Шаг 4: суммируем причину и преимущество путешествий:
In summary, one of the main problems of overeating is an impaired development of a child organism that leads to serious health disorders and this can be solved through obesity prevention policies.

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